Monday, November 26, 2012

Felt Like I Was Emotionally Frozen, But It's Only Resistance!

Back around the time I turned fifty I went through what felt like was sort of a frozen state of being. Not that I was cold but that I just didn't seem to be able to take action on things I wanted in my life and all I could do was sit around like some oblique melting ice sculpture.

Now in my sixth decade in this world I am up against this same feeling of an inability to take action toward my creative desires. This feeling of not being able to move, of not being able to take action is frustrating--to make an understatement--and still is such a mystery to me. Is it merely a lack of will power? Am I just lazy? Or what?

I think I may have found a reason for my lack of action toward my creative energy. I stumbled upon, Corrina Rachel, on YouTube. I watched her video, Why You Can't Change., which is really good, and she referred to, Steven Pressfield, and his book, "The War of Art"  I read the excerpt from his book, as well as other reviews, and have ordered the book.

I feel a bit better about myself now that I understand that my lack of action is not so much about my inabilities to get things going, but that I am up against a universal force that Pressfield calls, Resistance. I now feel that my oblique issue of not being able to achieve my creative goals is now defined. It is not just me, it is a force of nature and this new view is really starting to take root and I feel a strong sense of possibility!

In my philosophical thinking I have contemplated how it seems that resistance is needed for life. Some examples; child birth, a seed pushing up from the soil. I have also noticed how nature, the Life Energy, seems to keep on pushing through no matter what resistance it is up against. An example of this is how plants and such keep on trying to grow even when paved over. Any cracks available will be filled with green life! And tree roots will push up  sidewalks and streets and break through.

So, now is seems my inner work is to stop beating myself up for being lazy and use this understanding of Life Energy and the universal force of Resistance and see what I can do with it! Stay tuned for developments. 

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