Sunday, April 22, 2012

People who are judgmental are really screwed up!

Judgmental-ism.             Another schism of division.        A desperate attempt of protection-ism.

Confession is supposed to be good for the soul. Well, let me try it out and see. I feel a need to talk about how I have an almost constant judgmental thought train. I tend to make judgments about most everyone I see! i.e: look at how stupid he looks wearing that hat cocked sideways; look at how that old fart is trying to buy an identity with those Harley patches; look at that super fox; what a low life looking MF; and so on and so on. I know this isn't unique to me, however, it is something I really don't like about my self talk, yet feeling unable to stop the train.

Beyond this is how I can then feel like I am in some way better off than all those poor jerks around me! This is how I sometimes feel about my spiritual awareness, or at least what I want to believe as spiritual; I am somehow above it all, I "know" better, I don't have to play these stupid worldly games.

I guess my saving grace is that this crap is mostly going on in my head. My behavior is much better. When I interact with people I may judge I tend to be open and communicate from my heart and not allow the crap thought train to act out. I am generally genuine with people and try to see them for who they really are. I try to let them know I see them.

It seems like these thoughts are stronger when I'm not feeling so good. Maybe run down, or strung out, a bit sick, dealing with the blues. Perhaps my ego does this as an attempt to help me feel better about myself by seeing how other people are worse off than me. I can't say that it really helps because my negative self talk can kick in and judge myself for thinking such thoughts. 

I think I feel a bit better. Anyway this helps to see what it be and maybe this will set me free.

2 comments:

  1. Hey Dennis....read your email request to go to this site....I love what you write! I feel you are absolutely filled with the Light of Love and Understanding! You are not afraid to face your demons and in doing that you are neutralizing what power you think they may have over you....Bravo!

    So anyway, I hope I'm doing this right! I'm in computer kindergarten, you know! I think my friend Rusty would like to read your stuff, too, and maybe set up her own blog, too

    Later, dear....tmae....

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